It has been a complicated year... 19 is a nice number but, it did not work with me.
Lots of things have seemed to change and life still goes on.
I finally start college in March (the carreer, the university).
I have such a good relationship with my only sister and mum.
I have build a nice friendship with Sun, but I destroyed another.
I lost my dear dog Jordan, I still miss him. What I can say is that he is in a part of my heart.
I have lost a friend, as I mentioned before ; she is completely so far away from me and there is nothing I can do, I have tried to get back her to where she once belonged, but, she is not available for me ; She has found a new group of friends and she is so happy. I chose to let her go.
I lost a father a bit, I guess so. After the floodwaters, days were larger and we felt so sad, desperate and we had not the strength to solve problems. Now we are separated, we used to be a family; but, sometimes what you thought that used to be perfect, suddenly it is broken. I am sure it happens wordly, not only in my family.
Perhaps we have been fighting so many years and it is time to let it go. I mean... we are looking for new ways of lives and there comes a day... I believe that we should stop and say: Hey, I plant my flag here. I have done all that I could and I decide to do this anymore.
It's so hard to say goodbye to people or pets that made your life so amazing... However, most people know that : death is a part of life. Obviously, people will not be there forever and that is for a reason (that someday is discovered).
I just desire people who I can trust , to have a shoulder to mourn and they never let me go. I recognize that they tend to be a few... It does not matter because I would like to have them next years and till the end of my life if it could be possible.
Nowadays, to be honest, I feel confident, secure, freak because something new is coming...
Maybe is because today I am bit older than yesterday and it is common to feel that kindness when it is your 20th birthday!
I do not mind if it is Monday, what is important is that people who really love and wish to see me cheerful and will be there to make my dreams come true.
I am not asking for anymore, I just want to fight as long as I find the way to achieve my aim.
It is highly probable that I make some mistakes writing today, I have not written in English for months, but, I have learnt something this year... TRY TO THINK LESS AND DO IT! If it is not okay, whatever happens it is going to be fixed or not, but at least you know you have tried on it. Last but not least: PLEASE, NEVER GIVE UP.
(Google was the first to congratulate me for my 20th birthday).
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